MID-LIFE CRISIS

15 years ago today, we moved into our house in Cornwall. That makes this home the longest I have lived anywhere and considering how unsure I have been about living here, it’s remarkable I’ve stuck it out. Over the years people who’ve followed me on social media have seen a ‘perfect existence’, sailing through blue seas, walking along empty beaches, sitting outside quaint pubs and eating in fine restaurants, all interspersed with holidays and short breaks away and mid-week days in London. The truth is, I’ve often been filled with self-doubt. A new existence can be lonely, especially if you don’t quite fit in.

Enter my home & you’ll always be welcome

So many people reach a time in their lives when they want to jump off their track and go on a tangent. I truly jumped in feet first. I didn’t know the area. I had no contacts in my new destination and the decision was based on the choice of a school for my daughter and a desire (not strictly mine) to own a boat.

The AGA is the soul of my house. My morning view eases in the day. 

At first I didn’t see the beauty of my new surroundings. I just felt a long way from anywhere. (It is!)

I had to learn it wasn’t all bad! 

It’s not all bad! I love the ruggedness of the north coast beaches, the wild countryside and the pretty fishing villages of the south coast. I feel privileged to buy fish landed that morning and vegetables, eggs and meat straight from the local farms. I love taking the boat and mooring off a tiny beach you can only reach from the sea. I feel surrounded by art and artists and a general quirkiness I’ve never experienced anywhere, that’s both endearing and fascinating. And I do have friends who are supportive and special. Yet completely cutting my strings with my old life hangs over me still. I love the opportunity London offers. And even if I do nothing with my time there, I can be inspired just sitting on the 19 bus as it goes down the Kings Road, swings round Sloane Square and onward to Knightsbridge.

I’m telling you this for several reasons. Firstly, if you have a desire to ‘up sticks and move’, think carefully. What are you leaving behind, what are you gaining? That thatched cottage, barn conversion, villa in the Med, or house on stilts in the Far East, might be your vision, but as they say, ‘a house is not a home’. You have to inject the energy and the love. Secondly, it’s not that easy to stay in touch with your ‘old friends’. Despite an open-invitation to everyone we know, not that many have made the journey to Cornwall. Thirdly, you have to really make an effort. I didn’t and suffered. Lastly, change of any kind is rarely easy or straight- forward. So, before having a mid-life (or later) crisis and making a major life-change, ask yourself why you’re doing it, and if it goes wrong, can you go back? And don’t come running to me to say you’ve made a terrible mistake because I’ve warned you!

midlife crisis  / my life  / my home / friends /family / life your life

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